It was stormy here last night - lots of wind and rain. Around eight o'clock, Clark told me that he heard two ghosts talking. I believe him, even though I don't know exactly what ghosts mean to Clark. It's not the first time he's mentioned seeing or hearing ghosts. He said the ghosts were talking about trees and that they looked like owls. He's not frightened of them. He hasn't indicated that his dad is a ghost.
I'm not quite sure what to make of it. I believe that Clark does have a very real connection to the spiritual world (and I wouldn't be surprised if it's deeper/stronger than my connection). His descriptions of the ghosts, as well as their location, jibes with a handful of other experiences I've had over the past few months. But sitting here now, looking out into a very black night, the thought of seeing a ghost is a little scary. Maybe - hopefully - if I actually experienced it, it would be comforting.
I've been less sad lately, but a little more stressed about all of the studying I need to accomplish this spring. I wonder if the latter is overshadowing the former. I've been experiencing fewer grief "triggers" lately, and I haven't cried in days. I realized something about triggers the other day. They're not external events causing sadness; they're expressions of the sadness in me that's looking for a vessel. It feels obvious in retrospect, but I didn't get it before. Sometimes my sadness needs to come out at random time, so completely random things (studying coagulopathies, for instance) can feel like they trigger a wave of grief.
That's about all I've got for tonight. Here are two little feel-good things for my sign-off:
First, 10 Painfully Obvious Truths (this one has been making the rounds on Facebook)
Second, kintsukuroi. (Thanks Wendy!)